I'm a sinner...

I'm reading a book right now called Purple Hibiscus, by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. Among other things, this book deals with the issue of sin. The main character's father is a strict, ridiculous Catholic who beats his wife and children whenever he decides they've "sinned." He's crazy. And usually I have a very forgiving attitude towards myself about sin...I'm not likely to beat myself up when I realize I've done something wrong. But just now I did something bad...and I feel awful.
It's late here, about 11:45 PM. Maybe thirty, forty minutes ago I was sitting in our living room with Tim and Christian and we heard a weird noise - a gasping, halting, desperate sounding cry coming from somewhere outside. We looked at each other and then Christian said "Look outside," so Tim and I looked outside. There was woman walking swiftly down the middle of the street, crying out and saying words I couldn't understand. And Tim and I slowly turned away from the window, looked at each other, and both thought "Well...I don't know what to do." And we both did nothing.
I kept thinking to myself Just go out there, just offer her some water, ask her what's wrong, run after her, can't you see she's in some kind of pain? And I kept ignoring myself, until it got to the point where I couldn't run after her anymore, because I had waited too long. Which, of course, is what I wanted to happen.
I missed a chance to be Jesus to that woman. I missed a chance to be the one who visits the sick and the imprisoned, the one who clothes the naked and feeds the hungry. I know God forgives me, but He's also probably disappointed, just like I am.